This Is Love | Qualities of Women Who Trust Jesus
“This is love: not that we loved God but that he loved us…” —1 John 4:10
This past summer, the temperature in our house reached a suffocating 90 degrees. Something wasn’t working properly, and no matter how many times we hit the button on the thermostat, the device was unable to regulate the house temperature.
Thermostats are really important because they set the tone of a place. They make it possible to even things out and create a comfortable atmosphere. If it’s too hot, a few clicks of a button can cool it down; too cold, and a few clicks can provide warmth.
Some days, hearing “Jesus loves you,” doesn’t warm our hearts. In fact, the familiar words seem to be deflated of meaning. We need God’s Spirit to breathe life into them again when our hearts grow cold. 1 John is a short but powerful book of the Bible that can change the atmosphere. It unfolds a beautiful description of what love is and what it is not.
Sometimes it’s helpful to gain a deeper understanding of a thing by first finding out what the thing is not. It’s kind of like explaining what constitutes a “meal” to my 13-year-old: a meal is not a bag of tortilla chips and a handful of candy corn. This is what the author does for us in 1 John 4:10 when he writes, “This is love: not that we loved God but that he loved us…”
The author defines love by saying what it isn’t before saying what it is.
Feelings of affection, devotion, and dedication have warmed the hearts of humanity for as far back into history as we can study. But this doesn’t make love what it is. The gushy feelings, the swells of emotion, the overflow of gifts and actions are wonderful, even matchless, experiences of human life, but they are not the reasons love exists.
Love is not a thing because we’ve made it a thing.
Love exists because God is love (1 John 4:16). Love originated with Him and is defined by Him. Love is what it is because love is who God is. The only reason we know love is because He loved us first (1 John 4:19).This is an incredibly freeing truth if our hearts are open to it.
Here’s why. If love starts with Him, that means it doesn’t start with us… which is a really good thing. Isn’t our love so unsteady? It’s not consistent or predictable. It wavers and falters; it wanes and fades. It rages with passion, then withers to nothing without warning. Love for God and His word— even love for the most precious people in our lives— fluctuates.
But this is the most amazing part: our unsteady love doesn’t have to mess up our day or our family. It doesn’t surprise God and it doesn’t worry Him either. Being the initiator, it’s God’s love, not our love, that sets the tone. His love is the thermostat that regulates our hearts, reminding us of His self-giving nature and enabling us to live with the same passion.
In your relationships, do you get tired of being the first to start a conversation, the first to apologize, the first to replace the empty toilet paper roll?
I’ll admit, being the one to initiate isn’t easy, but let’s remember who we are, Sister. We’re women who are empowered to initiate love for others because we are women who have been loved first. This is love. Let the truth of this love set the tone of our hearts and home today.
For Your Journal
Find It:
In this portion of your journal, write out a Bible verse. You can find a verse that fits a current life situation or use the one we used in today’s devotion.
“This is love: not that we loved God but that he loved us…” —1 John 4:10
Fix It:
In this portion of your journal, pull out a few key words from the verse you chose above, or summarize the verse in your own words. Write it in pretty lettering or sketch something that will help you visualize the meaning of the verse and fix it in your mind. Repeat these words to yourself throughout the week to remind you of the truth contained in the scripture. Here are some options:
God loved me first
This is love…
Feel It:
In this portion of your journal, write out a prayer. The goal is to absorb the meaning of the Bible passage and let it take root in your heart. Ask the Lord to let his word change you by the power of his Spirit so that you begin to feel like the new person you’re becoming in Christ. Surrender any areas of your life that you are trying to control.
Lord, forgive me for not being consistent in my love for you and others. It’s frustrating and scary when my heart grows cold, but you aren’t shaken by my ups and downs. You created me and you are intimately aware of my emotional fluctuations. I praise you for your love. Thank you that your love is good, your love stays strong, your love comes first. Thank you that your self-sacrificing, steady love sets the tone for my heart and my home today. Give me strength to selflessly love others for your glory. Amen.